Monday, April 18, 2011

Little Victory (or The Day I Took on the Treadmill)

Oh my goodness.  So, if you guys have never been on a manual treadmill, well, you're very lucky.  This machine is the devil incarnite as an exercise equipment.  I'm pretty sure the reason it's so difficult is because ours isn't oiled real well, and being totally powered by human-power, there is probably more friction than there really should be.  Regardless, I have grown to loathe this treadmill since the day I bought it.  Yeah yeah, I know, it's that very reason that makes it that much better of a workout.  But come on, it's HARD.

Anyway, Friday, in lieu of doing my usual 2 mile walk/run (which usually takes me just over 30 mins…this is important for later), I looked at the treadmill and decided I was going to take it on.  You guys, I had no idea what I was in for.

So I start out strong, nice brisk pace.  My original plan was to walk a 5k on it, since I'm trying to build up endurance for my next 5k in May (more about all that later).  So I set the display to only show the distance, and just keep on truckin'.  What follows is the rundown of what happened at different points of my workout.

Mile 0.1 - Feeling good, still going strong, brisk pace.  Breathing is picking up.  Dreams of 5k grandeur floating around in my head.

Mile 0.3 - Starting to work up a sweat, breathing has settled into steady huffing and puffing (I'm really out of shape, no delusions there for sure).  Still determined to walk a 5k, but considering settling for just 2 miles instead.

Mile 0.5 - Really sweating now, still a steady rhythm of panting.  Beginning to feel sore muscles in my butt and thighs (the treadmill has a slight incline, so it's like walking up a really gentle hill).  Thinking to myself "Are you kidding me?  I'm only halfway?  Crap…."  Quickly deciding that 2 miles is a better goal.

Mile 0.85 - Am now literally blinded by sweat running into my eyes and can't look up, sweat is pudding in the lenses of my glasses.  Try to frantically wipe away the sweat from my now burning eyes so I can see, all the while continuing to plug along…have settled on doing 1 mile and 1 mile only today and CRIPES WHY CAN'T I GET THERE ANY FASTER?!?

Mile 0.95 - Again blinded by rivulets of sweat running into my eyes and try frantically to wipe them away before I walk myself off the side of the treadmill.  SO FREAKING CLOSE.

Mile 1.0 - Stop immediately, wobble to sofa, fall down.  Proud to have pushed through, but HOLY CRAP.  Am completely drenched in sweat and desperately need a shower.  Eyes still burning.

You guys, I think I sweated out half my body weight onto the treadmill (gross, I know, but whatever).

Approximate amount of sweat on the treadmill after my workout.*
(*No dolphins were harmed in the duration of my walk)

You'd think that I just ran a marathon with the shape I was in afterwards, but no, just one measly little mile.  ONE!  Might I refer you to my previous statement of doing (on an almost daily basis now) 2 miles, outside in the real world, in just over half an hour.  Want to know how long this mile took me?  32 minutes.  That is SAD ladies and gents.  One mile in 32 minutes and I almost pass out, WTF?

Me before walk. (note happy, excited, go-get-em attitude)

Me after walk. (note lack of enthusiasm and lots of sweat)

Know what though?  I did it again the next day and beat my time by 5 minutes.  Still huffed and puffed, still sweat up a storm (but was prepared with a headband…I learn!), and my butt and thighs were still sore from the first attempt, but I did it.  I have now taken on this machine as a challenge.  I looked it square in the handlebars (no face you know…being a treadmill and all) and I said, "You are not going to beat me!"  I probably have issues, lol.  But anyway, I am continuing to take on the treadmill and by the end of the week I plan to do at least a 2 mile walk.  If nothing else I'll sweat all my weight off, and that can't be too bad.

Thursday, April 14, 2011

The Fire Alarm Hates Me

Yes, you read that correctly.

The fire alarm hates me.

For about the last 3 or 4 days (they're all starting to run together...), the fire alarm has been chirruping.  Just change the battery you say?  One would think that would be an easy solution.  The fact of the matter is, the battery HAS been changed.  TWICE.  In TWO DIFFERENT fire alarms.  Also noteworthy, it only starts beeping somewhere between midnight and 2 a.m. and continues to 6 a.m., when it then decides that it's tired and needs to take a rest.  Is is just me or is that fairly bizarre fire alarm behavior?

I think this is also why I've had a twitch in my left eye for approximately the same amount of time.


After checking every other fire alarm in the house, the issue has been resolved....for the time being anyway.  I'm not sure I trust it anymore.  *sideways look*

In other bizarre news of my life, I seem to have done something to my wrist.....while jogging.  Jogging!  I can only assume I did it while jogging because I was fine when I left, and when I came back, as soon as I got some water and sat down I got a shooting pain through my wrist and it's been there ever since.  I'm pretty sure I'm the only person on the planet that can torque a wrist going for a jog.  This also proves that exercise is dangerous and should be approached (if at all) with caution.  (Jillian or Bob, if you ever see this...I'm totally just kidding.  I'll be back outside tomorrow AND doing your dvd workouts and pleasedon'tmakemedo1000pushupsImaydie.)

In not so bizarre news, I'm officially unemployed for the time being, with a couple job prospects in the wings, neither of which will have any conclusive decisions/interviews until the first week in May.  Oi.  Well...on the positive side, that *in theory* gives me way more time to blog.  Right?  Right.  I'll try to maybe get some stories up of some of the craziness I've been dealing with the past few months, but I promise nothing.  :)

Anyway, it's getting on really late and I'm going to try to get to bed before the fire alarm starts its antics again.

*eye twitch*

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Monday Mingle!

Hi guys!
It just dawned on me this afternoon that I should record a Monday Mingle for the week!  This meme is brought to you by Jen @ EightyMPHmom, so you should go check her out!  I apologize for the quality of this video, its pretty terrible and I'm not sure why.  I guess my camera was just having none if it today, and I was too lazy to try and do it over for a better video.  The password is: misadventure.  Enjoy!

Monday Mingle April 11 from Lauren on Vimeo.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Oh hey

I remembered I can actually blog from my phone. I suppose that means I don't really have an excuse not to post doesn't it? Crap. Well we're winding down here anyway, not sure how much longer I'll actually have work, which is kinda scary. After this I'm kind of in limbo until July...I potentailly have a really cool job that starts at that time, but I'm awaiting confirmation. When I get something varified for sure I'll tell you all about it. Untill then, these are a couple phrases I look forward to not hearing on a daily basis:
"As the good Representative from <i></i>__ stated..."
"Well I have heartburn about this..."
"This is really a simple bill..."